Five Things for Friday

I haven't done one of these posts in awhile so it's gonna be more than five things! 

1. My Christmas shopping is done and so is most of the wrapping. The Christmas cards got sent out on time. I hosted a cookie swap for my book club and made festive Christmas cookies and a big crockpot of hot chocolate. I always feel like I'm behind with things at Christmastime, and this year it was even worse because I was sick, or tired from being sick, for the first couple weeks of the month, but when I see where I'm at I realize that things have gone pretty well. I still haven't reached my December ideal, which consists of lots of leisure time to read books while drinking cocoa, watching all the Christmas movies that I want to watch, and doing more meaningful things service-wise and worship-wise, but someday I'll get there. For now I try to accept and embrace the season of life that I'm in and not beat myself up for just going with the flow instead of trying to control it so much. 

2. The fall trend of things breaking around the house has unfortunately continued! The oven door suddenly refused to close and I had to get the hinges replaced, a heavy curtain swag in the family room came down on one side and is now perilously safety-pinned in place, and the Christmas lights on our gigantic tree all went out and I had to figure out how to fix that, which was a pain! Not to mention little things like screws popping out of kitchen cabinet doors and minor annoyances like that. But these annoyances mean that I have a comfortable home to live in and I try not to take that for granted. I'm thankful for it even when it is a pain to maintain!

3. I worked on my friend's husband's book years ago, mostly offering some feedback and advice, and unbeknownst to me he got it published this fall and they sent me a copy with a nice little note from him. He also mentioned my name in his acknowledgments in the book. I'm so happy for him! I'm looking forward to reading it soon. 

4. Speaking of books, I found a little gem at Barnes & Noble this past week. I was looking for a fun light Christmas read and found the perfect book: a murder mystery (yeah, I know that's not very Christmasy but I do love a good Christmas mystery) called Owl Be Home for Christmas (you know I love owls) and the author's name is Donna! I couldn't believe my luck! It's next up on my reading list.

My Goodreads goal was to read 40 books this year and I'm currently on #36 so I really need to get my reading gear in game to get to 40 by the end of the year. The last few Poldark books are soooo long and they've set me back, but I really want to finish the series this year because that was another one of my reading goals, so this weekend I plan to finish the second-to-last Poldark book that I'm currently reading, then Owl Be Home For Christmas, then the last Poldark book (which is over 600 pages long--I'm going to be reading up a storm next week), and then one more book, which is going to be a classic because I also had a goal to read two classics this year and so far I've only read one. I picked the shortest classic on my bookshelves that I haven't read yet--George Orwell's Animal Farm, which seems appropriate given the current social and political climate. Which leads me to... 

5. Alright, I'll go there but I'll be quick about it! I'm not happy about President Trump's impeachment. "Teflon Trump" is no longer. I think the impeachment is ridiculously partisan and that what he did was not impeachable, I think it's terrible for our already divided country, and I think it's going to galvanize his base like little else and will make him more likely than ever to win re-election next year. And I hope he does because even though he's far from perfect and I don't like everything about him, he does what he says he's going to do, and I happen to agree with a lot of what he's doing for the country. 

6. Another topic from the news that's been on my mind is the controversy with Hallmark Channel's airing of an ad with a gay couple getting married. I love the Hallmark Channel in part due to how wholesome and clean it is, which is so refreshing because of all the filth that is out there for entertainment now. 

I'm so tired of the LGBTQ lobby trying to force everyone to be exposed to their agenda and beliefs. People rip on my church for how we share our beliefs through missionary work and other less direct ways, but that is worlds apart from the confrontational, bullying, in-your-face way the LGBTQ lobby shares their beliefs with the world. The contrast in approaches is telling as to their ultimate source and their overall goals and motives. There are a lot of people across the country who acknowledge LGBTQ rights but don't want to see the gay lifestyle in their entertainment. It's as simple as that. I'm one of those people. I love and accept my gay cousins but I don't want to see gay relationships in the things that I watch or read because it makes me uncomfortable. It goes against some of my most important and fundamental beliefs and it doesn't feel right to me to see it for entertainment. Hallmark Channel was one of the only places where you didn't have to be exposed to that, because it's almost everywhere else now. 

Granted, it was just a part of a commercial and because I DVR everything I don't watch commercials anyway, but that's beside the point. It's a slippery slope. The head of Hallmark Channel said in an interview recently that they'd be open to gay couples being in future movies and shows. If they do that, then I'm not sure what I'll do--either not watch the movies or shows that have that in them, or stop watching the channel completely. I'd be sad to give up Hallmark Channel, but it's important to take a stand. I hope they come to their senses and don't further alienate their faithful (pun intended) fan base.

7. This is one of the cutest ugly Christmas sweaters I've ever seen!

8. And this is a pretty sleigh ride Christmas sweater that I bought for half off from Talbot's this week. It's navy blue with tiny white dots, one of my favorite styles!

9. I'm so glad that 2019 will be over soon. This was a hard year with lots of challenging things in it. Because of that I've grown in a lot of positive ways that have made me stronger, smarter, and wiser. But man, sometimes I'd rather have an easier life without the growth! Ha ha. But I know that's what life is about, and I truly do have so much to be thankful for, and there were a lot of good things that happened this year. But I'm still glad it's almost over. I'm looking forward to not only a new year, but also a new decade. I think we're in for a real rollercoaster ride for 2020 and beyond! 

10. My new year's resolution for this blog is to get all caught up by June, and from then on, I'll blog a lot more in real-time, or only a couple of months past real-time since I only upload my pictures every few months. Once I'm caught up I'm going to get blog books printed from the last several years so that I'm all up to date on those (for the possible day when the internet goes dark and everything on it is lost...at least I'll have my books! Until they get destroyed by the fire that's going to burn the earth...okay I'll stop now!). 

I'm sorry this wasn't the most festive of posts! I tried but I know it falls way short! I wish you a very merry Christmas, a peaceful holiday season, and a happy new year!

Un-Victorian Behavior

I've been enjoying the second season of Victoria on PBS, but I've been bothered by one of the side storylines in which two of the men who worked for Victoria were attracted to each other. I was curious about one of them, Lord Alfred Paget, who I'd heard about before, so I did some online investigating to find out more about him. I was surprised to learn that he wasn't gay at all; he was married and had 14 kids! And contrary to what's on the show, he and the other man didn't even work for Victoria at the same time. There is no evidence or even speculation that either of them were gay.

This bothers me. The writer of the show, Daisy Goodwin, has invented a scenario to make this beautiful historical drama fit in with today's culture. In an interview about it she says that there were just as many gay people back then as there are now, and she insinuates that Victoria would have approved of the (non-existent) relationship if she'd known. I find both of these to be wildly speculative statements, and irrelevant ones since the men didn't have that kind of a relationship at all. I think it's a real dishonor to their memory and to who they really were. 

I thought that a show like Victoria would surely be safe from this kind of storyline. I'm disappointed that it isn't, although I suppose I shouldn't be too surprised since it's been creeping into so many shows, even high-quality ones, slowly but steadily over the years. I believe the next episode unfortunately features a kiss between the two men, and then one of them gets killed in the season finale (spoiler alert, sorry!). So thankfully--hopefully--that's as far as the show will go with that. While people have the right to live that kind of lifestyle (including people who I know and love), my personal and religious beliefs are that it's not God's way, and I'd really rather not see it in my entertainment. I'll continue to watch Victoria, but if another storyline like that crops up, I'm probably done. :-( 

Other than that, I really do like this show!

Church Policy is My Policy

I don't want to write a lot about this because I'm getting tired of the whole thing after it blew up like a volcano last Friday and over the weekend, and I've found my peace with it and I'm ready to move on, but I just wanted to say something here on my blog about the Church's policy change regarding gay couples who get married and the repercussions for them and for their children (don't know what I'm talking about? See here.) 

{Sorry, that whole paragraph was one very long run-on sentence!}  

At first when I found out that the kids of gay married couples will be unable to join the Church until age 18, I thought why would they do that and deny those children the blessings of church membership as they grow up? Of course they can still attend church and take part in many of its activities, just as their parents can, but they can't receive baby blessings, be baptized, or do temple work. I was curious about this more than anything. A little upset, but not really as my faith in Church leadership tends to be very strong--not a blind faith, but an informed and thoughtful one. As the reasons for this policy became clear, they made a lot of sense to me--logical and loving sense, and completely in the interest of families and children. I understand why these policies are being instituted, and I support them. My faith in the Church and its leadership is strengthened. The First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve know what they're doing and and they have the courage to do things that aren't popular but that are right. 

It's disheartening to see many members who are angry and doubtful, and it's also disheartening to see friends who have left the church who react with a mixture of derision, anger, criticism, misunderstanding, harsh judgment of the church and its members, and a sense of victory that they left this supposedly backward church before this ever happened. On the other hand, it's very encouraging to see that many members have reacted with understanding, support, and reaffirmation of their faith in the gospel and in the Church. I think there are thankfully many more supportive members than those who aren't. I'm sure there are also many members who are unsure about all of this right now and it will take them some time to work through it, and that's okay too.

The ONLY critique I have for the Church is that I think they should have issued a statement or press release early on Friday in anticipation of the coverage and controversy that this news was going to receive. I'm glad they released the video interview with Elder Christofferson later in the day on Friday, but I wonder why they didn't have anything ready to go earlier. They usually do, and I think that would have been helpful.

You know what's weird? I had a feeling last week that something was in the air and was going to happen. It was an impression I felt a few times. But I had no idea it would be something like this. I don't remember anything happening with Church policies in my lifetime that comes close to being as controversial as this has turned out to be, so it's kind of a new experience. I think this whole thing is a sign of the times, and I keep thinking of the parable of the wheat and tares being sifted and that it might have a direct application to this situation. 

And now I'm done. If people disagree with me and with the Church, they have every right to do so, but the Church and I also have the right to believe in what we feel is right. To quote from the 11th Article of Faith: "We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege."

Words of Wisdom from March

This article was so good and SO RELEVANT. Many people would greatly benefit from reading things like this and then doing them.

Evidence-based thinking as opposed to the cognitive distortion of confirmation bias

It's an unpopular view, but that doesn't mean it's wrong. In fact, that makes it even more likely that it's correct. We live in a very confused world. (This is not anti-gay; I love my gay cousins for example, but I still don't believe homosexuality is God's way for His children. I believe that like so many other mortal difficulties, it's something that people who are affected with will one day be healed from.)

This is how I feel about the Covid vaccine. I sincerely hope that I'm wrong.

It's been in the works for awhile and is happening now...#signsofthetimes 

It's a miracle--words of wisdom from my liberal alumni magazine! 

This is a great point and one that we all need to remember better, myself included.

I try to live my life with this in mind. Too often I don't do as well as I could, but I keep trying and will never give up. For me it's all about the Savior and my love for and devotion to Him.

Polygamy

I like to watch Oprah when the topic interests me, and Friday's show definitely interested me. It was about polygamy and families who are practicing it in the U.S. today. These are predominantly splinters from the mainstream Mormon church who disagreed with the Church when the practice was formally renounced in 1890, so they continued to practice it anyway and formed their own little communities out in the desert to do so.

The polygamous wives on the show were so normal looking. It was weird! They were attractive and articulate, their homes were lovely, their kids were cute (all 25 of 'em!)...in short, they were a lot like modern-day "soccer moms." A husband came on the show with his three wives--two of them were sisters. Creepy! He was a successful businessman who seemed nice enough. It was hard to believe these people were polygamists and were so (seemingly) happy and content with the practice. (Are these women from another planet?) They want it to be legalized so that they don't have to be outcasts anymore and can live in the community like normal people. The case can be made that if gay marriage is allowed, then other forms of marriage are going to need to be permitted as well. I hope legalization of polygamy doesn't ever happen. The most I can see happening is it maybe getting de-criminalized. Would that be a good thing or a bad thing? I'm not sure.

A woman named Carolyn Jessop was also on the show. She grew up in Colorado City, Arizona in a cult-like community of fundamentalists that is much, much worse than the places where the above-mentioned people live. These are the people who totally shun the outside world and dress like they still live in the 1800's. That's where Warren Jeffs is from...he's the so-called prophet of these people who was recently convicted as an accomplice to rape. It is really sad. That place is like Iran. Anyway, Carolyn Jessop escaped with her children in 2003 after years of misery living in polygamy in this awful dictatorial world. She just wrote a book called "Escape" about what her life was like there. I went out and bought it the next day and am eager to read it. Here's the link to find out more about the book if you're interested:
http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?EAN=9780767927567

I have always been fascinated by these polygamists. I can't believe what they're doing! I feel a small level of affinity for them because their forebearers were once members of the Church and so we share some doctrinal beliefs (unrelated to polygamy) and practices (such as Sacrament Meeting and singing the same hymns and songs) as well as a similar heritage. Some of my ancestors on my father's side were pioneers who trekked out West to settle; one of them was even an associate of Joseph Smith's. None of them practiced plural marriage, however. Only a small percentage of the pioneers ever did.

I once read in an opinion piece in Time magazine that members of the Church wish these people would just go away, and that's kind of true, at least for me. They perpetuate the association of Mormons and polygamy and make it seem like it's something that Mormons really do still do, or at least want to do, and that isn't true. They discredit the Church and its message, which it doesn't deserve. I personally do not understand polygamy. I know that great men like Abraham practiced it, and in more recent times, Joseph Smith and of course Brigham Young. But I just can't understand it and I find the idea of it to be abhorrent. I cannot imagine living life like that. The practice is inherently sexist and demeaning to women. It would be less so if women were allowed to have more than one husband in these communities so that then there would at least be equality in that respect. Wouldn't that be interesting? But still, it wouldn't be good. Maybe someday it will indeed all just go away. One spouse at a time should be enough for everyone!

Crazy Times Scrapbook, April 2022

 Well the good thing about my Crazy Times posts if for some "crazy" reason you don't enjoy them 😁 is that they're getting shorter since my time to peruse the news has been getting shorter because of work. I changed my Wall Street Journal subscription this spring to only getting the print copy once a week instead of six days a week. I miss it, but unfortunately I don't have the time to read it every day anymore. I still get it every day on the app, but it's not the same. If I don't have a physical paper, then I'm less likely to read it. But of course, I still follow the news and I'll continue to do these posts because the times we live in continue to be crazy and (not to be a pessimist) I believe they're going to get worse.

April's post is especially short because of what a busy month it was!

Good for Oklahoma! 

And good for the Supreme Court to finally right the monumental wrong that was done 49 years ago. I'm overjoyed by their decision to overturn Roe v. Wade.

The incredibly tragic irony of this when you think of the Democrats' positions on racial equity, social justice, and abortion rights is jarring.

Don't get either of them! They're not worth it.

This silly mask mandate got struck down in time for our Florida trip, which we were able to enjoy entirely mask-free. 🙌

This is totally appropriate. And contrary to popular uninformed opinion, the bill doesn't mention the word "gay" at all. What is wrong with people? I'm very disappointed, though not surprised, by Disney's reaction. 

This makes some very interesting points about Ukraine, Russia, and American imperialism.

Five Things for Friday

1. I wish Cadbury Creme Eggs came in dark chocolate. How has this not happened yet? Every chocolate candy seems to be jumping on the dark chocolate bandwagon. Cadbury Creme Eggs would be so delicious with a dark chocolate shell. I don't enjoy them that much anymore--the milk chocolate shell is just not doing it for me. That's the disappointment I have to deal with every Easter season.

2. There was a picture on Pottery Barn's Instagram account this week that had my dream bed in it. It was on a beach and it was the loveliest picture of a bed on a beach that I've ever seen. I very much wanted to put it on here, but Instagram won't let me do it and I can't figure out how to get around it. All I was able to manage to get from Instagram was my profile picture and Pottery Barn's PB logo. Ha ha!

Oh wait, look! I figured it out! Don't ask me how because I'm not sure.  

This bed on a beach would be a dream come true (barring any rain and bugs!).

Absolutely lovely! Just looking at this helps me to feel more relaxed.

3. I like these pictures of Presidents Bush and Clinton sitting together at the NCAA men's basketball championship game on Monday night. These are two great men and I'm glad that they're buds. (At least until the presidential election of 2016--which I can't wait for--if Hillary and Jeb Bush run!)

4. Now for some meaty stuff. I've been thinking lately about how I rarely write on my blog anymore about social issues/politics/controversial things/news events of note. I used to do that a lot more and I'm still very interested in all of those things, but now my focus on my blog is more on documenting me and my family's life and experiences, with a bit of fluff thrown in for fun (numbers 1 and 2 above are especially good examples of the fluff I can churn out). I don't have the time to blog anymore like I used to, so I write about the things that are most important to me that I most want to have on record for the future. If I truly feel passionate about something and feel like I need to share it on my blog, I will, but I usually don't have the time, the energy, or the inclination.

But that doesn't mean that I don't think about lots of things. If I had the time and the inclination, perhaps I'd write more extensively about issues like the following that have been on my mind lately:

-Ordain Women. I disagree with them, and like all movements that are destined to fail, I think they'll fade away with time. I don't say that to be flippant and dismissive because I know that this issue really matters to a small percentage of women in the Church, but that is truly how I feel about it. 

-I think it's completely ridiculous and really sad that the new CEO of Mozilla (Firefox) stepped down because people found out he donated to Prop 8 in California a few years ago and made a huge uproar about it. They say he was being discriminatory (for a personal and religious belief in his private life that really has no bearing on his professional life), but don't they realize that they're being discriminatory by persecuting him for supporting traditional marriage, which he did quietly, respectfully, and privately? It's so hypocritical that it boggles the mind. In the name of supposed intolerance they're being intolerant themselves. Even some prominent gay-rights activists have said that what happened was wrong. This post from The Matt Walsh Blog is more heated than I am about this debacle but it has given me much food for thought on the matter.  

-Well now that I've gotten warmed up, here I go. This is the issue that's bothered me the most this week. I was disappointed that Chili's canceled their fundraiser this past Monday for Autism Awareness Month. They were going to donate a percentage of participating diners' proceeds to the National Autism Association, but lots of people raised a big fuss about it on Chili's Facebook page because the NAA is sympathetic to people who believe that vaccines may have hurt their children. So Chili's canceled the fundraiser and the NAA didn't get anything from them to help families who are affected by autism. I think that's really sad.

I know vaccines are good, and of course I believe in them, but guess what? 

There are people out there, myself included, who have had experiences with vaccines that make us suspicious of and cautious about our children's vaccinations. I believe that they can cause harm to {some} children and people; not many, but some who are more sensitive to what's in the vaccines than most people are. Whenever I see a pro-vaccination article shared on Facebook or some other place that bashes people who are cautious about/wary of/suspicious of vaccines, I feel a little sad and defensive, because I know from personal experience that some parents have good reason to think twice about how their kids get vaccinated. And that is not based on the discredited 1998 study that they're always saying we base our beliefs on. My caution comes not from misinformation or ignorance but from experience and research. I feel that the vaccination schedule for all kids is stacked heavily with too many vaccines at once for their little developing systems, and that some kids are very sensitive to this with tragic life-changing effects, and that for safety's sake the vaccines should be spaced out more than they are. 

I rarely see anyone stand up for those of us who choose to think twice about vaccines. Many of us have a good reason for feeling the way that we do. It doesn't mean we're right...but we very well could be.

(Just a note: my children are fully vaccinated and so am I, but we skip things like flu shots, and I spaced many of their vaccinations out, especially when they were younger.)  

Whew! I hope I haven't alienated too many of you after all that. And you thought you were going to get a totally fun, lighthearted Five Things for Friday, didn't you? :-) It did feel good to get that out. Maybe I should opine more often?

5. Next week I'm taking an unexpected trip to New York City with John and Sam to see my sister get married in Central Park! It's unexpected because my sister and her fiance are eloping but they recently decided to ask close family to be there. I am so happy to be going back to one of my favorite places for such a happy event. 

Central Park.

It's been nine years since I've been to New York. The last time I was there was when I was pregnant with John. I knew the city quite well when we lived in New Jersey because I went in once or twice a week for classes I was taking at NYU and for job interviews and going to the temple and things like that. Peter and I had some great date nights in Manhattan. One night when we were in Times Square on our way back to Penn Station after dinner, he changed the color and moving graphics of the Prudential sign at the top of Times Square for me. He had the special codes to do it by phone because he worked for Prudential. I was so impressed and it's one of my favorite memories of the city. See the sign down below? 

 I got to know Manhattan well, especially Midtown, and after awhile I stopped walking everywhere or taking a taxi and became good at using the subway. I knew I'd made it when people started asking me for directions on how to get places. Now it's nine years later, and I don't remember how to use the subway that well (I definitely don't remember all the different subway lines!), and while I do remember the layout of Midtown pretty well and where things are, my city smarts aren't quite as sharp as they once were. 

It will be humbling to be back as a tourist! And it will be so much fun! 

We aren't going to be there for very long and we'll spend most of our time on wedding festivities, so there won't be a lot of time to go out and do things, but that's okay with me. It will be great to be back.

Ahhh, this picture brings back happy memories of a very happy time in my life!

Okay. I'll stop now. I got all of the above images from my "I Love Manhattan!" board on Pinterest. LOL!

I have a dream to live and work in Manhattan, someday, somehow! 

But until that happens, I'll just have to enjoy taking occasional trips there about every 9-10 years. :-)